Be Stoic

Calvin first read the book, "the Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking" by Oliver Burkeman, and now I have gotten into it!

We are both particularly smitten with the description within the book of the  philosophy of the Stoics. Here is a quote that sums up nicely one of their main tenants:

"If you accept that the universe is uncontrollable, you're going to be a lot less anxious." Albert Ellis

A helpful exercise the stoics seem to engage in, is to imagine how any situation you fear could be a lot worse. It is strangely calming to use this technique! My genius aunt Barb used this method once when she was driving my sisters somewhere when we were kids and her car broke down. They kept repeating all that had gone wrong that day and then saying "but at least we don't have a lame donkey we have to carry on our backs!" 

Similar to Viktor Frankl's observations in his masterpiece: "Man's Search For Meaning", the Stoics seem to advocate acknowledging all that is outside of our control, while maintaining a clear vision of our ability to choose our reactions. An everyday (non tragic) example given in the book: 

If we don't like how long the line is at the grocery store- we can choose to wait and be a little late or leave. Getting angry no longer feels necessary because you acknowledge you do have a choice. 

My explanation/recap feels very weak compared to the insights found in the book! So far it's been a refreshing read. I highly recommend it!

Book Review: "The Procrastination Equation" by Piers Steel

Confession: Once in grade twelve I put off completing (maybe even starting??) a History paper by reading an 800 or so page biography of Florence Nightingale. It was a VERY moving book (that had nothing to do with my assignment) but it caused me a lot of anxiety and trouble due to the fact that it took me weeks (maybe months?) to finally get my paper in. It did not take me long at all to read the biography but the fact that my paper was already late made it harder to even work on it. Sorry Mr. Lindahl! Ha! How I still managed to be the Valedictorian of my graduating class is a mystery (to Calvin) but like I said in my speech, that year it was based on looks. But seriously now folks, my English teacher that same year told us once in class that she used to have a problem with procrastinating but then she read a book about it and stopped. She made it sound so easy! And I really liked her as a teacher. I vowed to follow her lead. So fourteen years later, I have finally followed through on that commitment:)

This is why I love the children's book: "Leo the late Bloomer" by Robert Kraus. Its about a tiger that couldn't do anything right until finally one day he blooms! Once I labeled myself a "late bloomer" I stopped feeling quite so bad about my awkward teenage years:) And awkward years in general. We all have had those years, as my friend Sarah would say, those years before we knew to pluck our eyebrows.

Back to procrastination. Piers Steel is a real gem. He writes with authority and humour. He acknowledges the reading of his book is probably an act of procrastination in and of itself. He explains why procrastinating is the natural human way and what we can do to overcome it. I love him for his hatred of the book "The Secret" (sorry friends who love that book!) and I love how he gets specific with what to do. For example, make Approach Goals, i.e. start early rather than Avoidance Goals i.e. Don't begin late. The book has seriously changed how I house clean, make lunches, get the garbage out on time and renew library books! (No more embarrassingly high late fees!! :) It has also helped me actually write a little more. Writing is one of the greatest things to procrastinate, inspiring all types of cleaning and bouts of de-hoarder-izing one's home. Which are good activities but when you want to write- they get in the way. Anyway, it was, not to be too dramatic, a life-changing read for me. To any fellow procrastinators out there, get the book!

Photo from "Leo the Late Bloomer"

Book Review: "Tolstoy and the Purple Chair- My Year of Magical Reading" by Nina Sankovitch

I enjoyed this book- though it read more like a blog to me, which shouldn't be a surprise since it began as a blog. It is a memoir of a woman who spent a year reading a book every single day in an attempt to deal with the grief she felt after her sister's death. She is a passionate reader and believer in the healing power of literature. 

Some highlights for me include the story below about a young Ukrainian girl and her pure love for her mother, the most beautiful woman in the world...( P 8)

Here are some quotes that stood out to me:

...from a magazine on how to choose a book to read: "be serious, earnest, sincere in your choice of books, and then put your trust in Providence and read with an easy mind." (P 161)

This quote is in response to being told that nothing in the world matters except Love: "a banking account, sound teeth, and adequate servants matter a great deal more." (P 130- quote is from the Provincial Lady in London by E.M. Delafield)

A quote I liked from page191: 

" I realized it was my decision whether I would interpret the ending as unjust and unsatisfactory and suffer because of it or decided that this, and only this, was the fitting ending." (Taken from Self's Murder by Bernard Schlink) 

And a final quote from Tolstoy himself, "the sole meaning of life is to serve humanity." 

All in all- a satisfying and inspiring read. It has added to my list of books I want to read- the top of that list is "the Forged Coupon" by Leo Tolstoy

The author has a website called: ReadAllDay.org if you are curious about her voracious reading!